Feeling overwhelmed this holiday season? You’re not alone.
In today’s episode of The Secrets of Supermom Show, I’m joined by Kati Morton, licensed marriage and family therapist, mental health educator, and two-time best-selling author, whose new book Why Do I Keep Doing This? explores the patterns we can’t stop repeating—people-pleasing, overcommitting, perfectionism—and how to finally break them.
With millions of followers across her YouTube channel, podcast, and social platforms, Kati Morton has become a trusted voice in mental health. She has spoken for companies like Google, YouTube, and Unilever, and her work has been featured on Good Morning America, The Today Show, and The New York Times. Her warm, practical, down-to-earth style helps all of us show up for our families and ourselves with more energy, resilience, and joy.
Today, we dive deep into holiday overwhelm, boundaries for moms, emotional resilience, burnout, communication, and simple mental-health strategies you can use immediately.
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Rather read? Check out the show notes and episode content right here!
Show Notes: How to Beat Holiday Overwhelm, Set Better Boundaries, and Protect Your Energy
Hey, hey friend! Welcome to Episode #266 of The Secrets of Supermom Show!
Meet Kati Morton, LMFT
Before we get into the heart of holiday stress and overwhelm, Kati shares her background—how she went from a private therapy practice to creating mental-health content for millions online. Her passion? Making complex mental-health topics easy to understand and giving people tools that make life better today, not someday.
Kati’s newest book, Why Do I Keep Doing This?, released December 9, takes a personal, vulnerable look at why so many of us fall into the same emotional patterns over and over…and how to finally rewrite them.
Holiday Overwhelm: Why Moms Feel It So Intensely
If you’re feeling stretched thin this season, Kati wants you to know: it makes perfect sense. Moms are juggling everyday responsibilities plus gifts, events, school activities, family expectations, and the emotional load of making the holidays magical for everyone.
And when our emotional reserves are low?
The tiniest thing can send us straight into the red zone.
This is why Kati recommends focusing first on building resilience, not trying to “push through.” And her favorite place to start is with the HALT acronym—something moms can use for themselves and their kids.
HALT: A Simple Tool to Manage Overwhelm During the Holidays
Kati explains the HALT method (originally from AA and used widely in DBT) as a fast and powerful check-in that pulls us out of reactivity and into clarity.
H – Hungry:
Have you eaten in the last 3–4 hours? Blood sugar drops can create instant irritability.
A – Angry:
Is something bothering you? Have you vented, journaled, or talked it through?
L – Lonely:
When is the last time you connected with someone who really gets you?
T – Tired:
Are you getting enough sleep? (Spoiler: research suggests women may need closer to nine hours, not eight!)
BONUS: Shower + Health Check
When’s the last time you showered or washed your hair?
Are allergies, illness, or anything else making things harder?
These simple resets create more emotional buffer, meaning you’re less likely to snap, spiral, or break down in the car after school pickup.
Why Holiday Boundaries Feel So Hard (Especially for Moms)
If you struggle with boundaries during the holidays…welcome to the club.
Kati shares that many women grew up in families where boundaries weren’t modeled, respected, or even discussed. That means:
- Saying “no” can feel rude
- Setting a limit can feel like conflict
- Enforcing a boundary can feel like aggression
But the biggest misconception?
A boundary is not what you ask someone else to do. A boundary is what you will do.
For example:
“Don’t talk to me that way” is a request.
“If you continue talking to me that way, I’m going to step away” is a boundary.
Boundaries are about your action, not their behavior.
The #1 Boundary Moms Need Right Now: The Pause
If you take only one boundary tip into the holiday season, let it be this one:
“Let me think about that and get back to you.”
This protects you from automatic yeses, people-pleasing, overcommitting, and resentment later.
It gives your brain time to ask:
- Do I actually want to do this?
- Do I have the time?
- Do I have the energy?
- Will this add joy or drain me?
This tiny pause is a game-changer for moms who tend to jump into “How can I make this work?” mode without checking in with themselves.
How to Step Away Without Guilt: Using Wise Mind vs. Emotion Mind
Kati explains one of the most helpful DBT concepts for moms:
- Emotion Mind: reacting from irritation, frustration, overwhelm, or exhaustion
- Wise Mind: responding from clarity, calm, and intentionality
A pause allows you to shift from Emotion Mind to Wise Mind—and that’s where better choices live.
Removing yourself temporarily is not rude; it’s regulation.
The Communication Shift That Changes Everything
Most boundary problems are actually communication problems.
Kati emphasizes using I-statements to share your experience without putting the other person on the defensive.
Compare:
❌ “You’re always so rude. You shouldn’t talk to me like that.”
✔️ “I felt really hurt during our conversation yesterday and need a little space before we talk again.”
One triggers defensiveness.
The other opens communication.
When you communicate to be heard, instead of to win or to fix, the entire dynamic changes.
When Moms Feel Like Superwoman—Kati’s Personal Take
Kati shares that she feels most like Superwoman when she’s:
- slept well
- not overscheduled
- able to move her body (yoga is her favorite reset!)
- connecting with someone who truly gets her
It’s a beautiful reminder that Superwoman isn’t about doing more. It’s about feeling like yourself.
One Simple Step Moms Can Take Today
Kati recommends starting here:
Take a beat before you say yes. Every time.
This single practice can reduce overwhelm, prevent burnout, and protect your time and energy—especially during the holidays.
About Kati Morton + Her New Book
Kati Morton is a licensed marriage and family therapist, mental-health educator, and two-time best-selling author whose work has reached millions worldwide. Her latest book, Why Do I Keep Doing This?, is her most personal yet—exploring the patterns of control, people-pleasing, shrinking, perfectionism, and the behaviors that keep us stuck.
This book is for any mom who has ever said:
“I know better…but I still keep doing this.”
You can find Kati at @katimorton on Instagram, TikTok, and YouTube (her core platform where she releases new videos every Monday).
Links Mentioned in This Episode
- Kati Morton’s Website: https://www.katimorton.com
- New Book — Why Do I Keep Doing This?
- Kati on YouTube, Instagram, TikTok: @katimorton
If You Loved This Episode…
Share it with another mom who needs encouragement, boundaries, or a reminder that she is absolutely not alone in her overwhelm.
And if you haven’t yet, make sure to subscribe, leave a review, and join us weekly for practical tools that help busy moms live with more ease, confidence, and joy.
About Our Guest: Kati Morton
Kati Morton is a licensed marriage and family therapist with a master’s in psychology, a mental health educator, and a two-time best-selling author whose work has reached and helped millions of people worldwide. She’s built a global community through her YouTube channel and podcast, where she breaks down complex mental health topics into easily digestible pieces and gives practical advice that can be incorporated into your daily life.
Her new book, Why Do I Keep Doing This?, comes out December 9th this year and dives into the patterns we can’t seem to break, from overcommitting to people-pleasing, and how to finally rewrite them. Kati has spoken for companies like Google, YouTube, and Unilever, and she’s been featured in outlets including Good Morning America, The New York Times, and The Today Show. Above all, she’s a warm, down-to-earth voice for anyone trying to show up for their family and themselves with more energy, resilience, and joy.
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About the Host: Lori Oberbroeckling
Lori Whitney Oberbroeckling is a mom of four, corporate leader, podcaster, productivity expert, and author of the book Secrets of Supermom: How Extraordinary Moms Succeed at Work and Home & How You Can Too!
She is passionate about helping parents who want fulfilling careers–or side hustles or passion projects–while also wanting to feel present and connected to their families.
