(Excerpted from original interview in Medium by Authority Magazine and Thrive Global.)
2020 was hard. Social isolation, homeschooling, and so much loss. Is there something we can learn from the social isolation of the pandemic that can actually make our life better post-pandemic?
Authority Magazine and Thrive Global invited me to an interview on exactly this topic. Today I am sharing 5 things I have learned for myself and for our family. For the whole interview, head over to Authority Magazine or Thrive Global.
What are your “5 Things I Learned From The Social Isolation of the COVID19 Pandemic?”
I was so thrilled to be asked to be part of this series for exactly this question. So many of us are trying to just “get through it” that I fear we are not sitting down with our collective selves and really thinking about what we have learned. How can we stop for a minute and think about what we can carry forward in our lives? What do we want to change? What do we want to leave behind from our old life, from our old “normal”?
The five things I have learned from the social isolation of the COVID pandemic are:
We don’t have to do everything.
As a mom from a busy family, we are constantly on the go. This is not unlike many families I know and many moms I have talked with in researching my book. When the pandemic put everyone’s lives at a standstill, it was a shock. However, many parents have realized that the slower pace has been better for their family. Maybe they play more games or spend more time outside together. Maybe they simply eat dinner together now instead of in the car between activities. As things begin to open back up, we need to do ourselves a favor and remind ourselves that we don’t have to do everything. We have the chance now to only add back in the things we want to do and actually decide to do as a family.
Pivot.
When in doubt, change directions. Our ability to be flexible when something gets in the way is critical to success. I strongly believe the businesses that have succeeded, and the families that have stayed stronger than ever have done so because they pivoted. For me, one of those pivots was the expectation for homeschooling I mentioned earlier. By changing my focus from grades to simply being independent and responsible with school work, we had a much easier and dare I say even more successful go at homeschooling.
The choice is always ours.
We didn’t get to choose the pandemic. We didn’t get to choose lockdowns or homeschooling or job loss or illness. But we always get to choose how we react. We choose how we will move forward. We choose what is best for our own family in the circumstances we have. We choose our attitude. I could have decided to whine and stay angry. I could have chosen to complain about every step of our homeschooling experience. I could have chosen any number of attitudes. I chose to focus on how I wanted to feel at the end of the pandemic. Would I be proud that I did the very best I could with the most positive attitude I could muster? If yes, then it was the right choice.
It is critical to talk to your children, even when you don’t have all the answers.
We have talked ad nauseam over the last year. We have talked about the virus. We have talked about how we want our lives to be. We have talked about questions that I certainly can’t answer. We have talked about puberty and the birds and the bees and politics and why people do the things they do. I think it is important to talk to your children about everything, to let them ask questions, and to tell them when you don’t know the answer. As we discuss, we teach them to think on their own. We teach them to ask questions, to learn, to investigate. It is critical because they are always listening. I want my kids to be independent, responsible, and nice. I can only teach them to have these characteristics by talking to them and modeling these traits.
I need hugs.
I sure miss good, strong bear hugs. From a scientific perspective, a 20-second hug reduces stress and blood pressure, increases oxytocin, and increases happiness. It’s no wonder I miss them!
