Dr. Alison Escalante joins us on today’s episode of The Secrets of Supermom Show to talk to us about the “shouldstorm” that is plaguing today’s parents. Perfection and criticism resulting in increased anxiety in kids and adults cause parents, and especially moms, to feel like they “should” be doing things differently. Dr. Escalante shares with us the reality of parenting in 2022 and 3-steps you can use to arrive at calmer, less anxious parenting.
Dr. Escalante is on a mission to eradicate the epidemic of anxiety that impacts us as professionals and parents. Professionals operate on the edge of burnout, and parents (caught in a culture of criticism and perfectionism) are increasingly raising the most anxious generation of kids ever seen. Dr. Escalante developed a method rooted in neuroscience so we can take affection action under the pressure. She even presented her Sigh, See, and Start method at TEDx.
A Board Certified Pediatrician, and an Adjunct in Pediatrics at Rush University, Dr. Escalante publishes widely for a national audience. She writes on the science of human performance as a Forbes Contributor, and on the culture of anxiety as a Contributor for Psychology Today. Having studied Cultural and Ideological History at Princeton, Dr. Escalante has unique insight into the way both organizational and social cultures impact our performance.
Ready to listen? Use the podcast player or listen anywhere you find your favorite podcasts. (Don’t forget to subscribe so you never miss an episode!)
Rather read? Check out the show notes and episode content right here!
Show Notes: Dr. Alison Escalante
Hey, hey friend! Welcome to Episode #49 of The Secrets of Supermom Show!
Let me pose a few thoughts for you.
“You should really feed him only organic food. All those pesticides. Ugh, it’s terrible for babies.”
“Her behavior is not normal. You should really get her tested.”
“You should breastfeed. Breast is best.”
“You should really teach him to take a bottle.”
“You should put her in this program ASAP. Don’t you know that good schools are super competitive now?”
“Do you always let him cry like that? A good mom should know what her baby needs.”
“Maybe you should give him a consequence for talking to you like that?”
“You should….”
Anyone ever told you what you “should” do as a mom? Or maybe the recommendations are a little softer, but still cause the stress and the guilt and the anxiety of…the “shouldstorm”.
Dr. Alison Escalante, pediatrician, writer, and TEDx Speaker, joins us today to talk about the “shouldstorm”–the epidemic of anxiety that has convinced us that we are always failing and is ultimately stealing our joy. She is a woman on a mission to eradicate the “shouldstorm” and has developed a 3-step method to help parents raise their kids skillfully and enjoy doing it. Dr. Escalante is not only a parenting expert but also writes for Forbes on the science of human performance and Psychology Today on life in the culture of anxiety. She really knows her stuff, and I know you are going to love today’s interview.
Today we discuss…
- The “shouldstorm” plaguing parents including what it looks and feels like to be hit by the “shouldstorm”
- The messages from our culture telling us how to parent
- Increasing intensity in the level of stress Dr. Escalante sees from parents in her pediatric practice
- A study noting the key factor for raising happy, healthy children into happy, healthy adults
- How the “shouldstorm” can detach us from our children instead of pulling us together
- The lie of the perfect parent
- The true core of the parenting relationship
- Coregulation and how this works in connecting with your kids
- How to trust that YOU are good for your child, that YOU are what they need
- Why women often feel like failures as moms
- The tremendous pressure parents are under whether they work full time, part-time or stay home with their children
- 3-steps to rid yourself of the “shouldstorm” (while under pressure when you have no time to think about it!)
- The benefit of “sighing” to the body and how it indicates safety vs. stress and fear
- Body regulation (or mindfulness) and the impact on calm parenting
- Using mistakes as learning experiences instead of lost failures
- The concept of an “experiment” when tryin 0g new things in parenting
- How modeling impacts our parenting and why the fastest way to change a child is to change as the parent
- Why our job is to equip our children and not to fix all their problems
Interested in finding out more about Dr. Alison Escalante? You can find her…
Dr. Alison Escalante on Facebook
Dr. Alison Escalante on Instagram
